an epic poem, in 22 parts

December began a new trimester and a whirlwind in the academic world of ACA. It began our Christmas break, we left homework in our wake, which left us all screaming “YAY!”

The group kicked off the Christmas month that started with a trip to Peru. To Lima we went and time in Cusco we spent, as well as Machu Picchu.




The first city was great, Americanized and cold, but was best cuz I met up with Chris. We frolicked and ate and stayed up late catching up on all we had missed.



Cusco brought rain and too many tours that were long and dull and boring. Though the city was quaint with a European taint, the travel and altitude left us snoring.



Machu Picchu was grand and so surreal, I couldn’t believe I was there. But a four hour tour and getting rained on like a storm sewer, to leave the city, we gladly did dare.




On the plane back to Argentina I got stuck next to a mouth breather, which was not extremely fun. So in a blanket cocoon I weathered the bad breath monsoon, and waited until the flight was done.

We returned to la UAP to unpack and do laundry, a quick shower and running around willy nilly. 10 of us girls, with hair straightened or curled, embarked on a journey that would take us to Bariloche and Chile.

A 26-hour bus ride began the journey, many alfajores and bread meals we had. A blanket and pillow and a big cold window, and we were able to sleep a tad.



When we woke the next morning to the beauty of Patagonia, we heard something that gave us a fright. Three men with flashlights who had not been in sight had entered our bus and looked at everything during the middle of the night.

In Bariloche we chilled and slept and we ate a couple of times in there too. We made popcorn a lot and ate much chocolate, and partook of chocolate caliente too.



To Santiago we went, stopping in Osorno on the way, it really is a dumpy city. A too many hour layover was had, but it wasn’t all bad, once we bought lots of food and sang silly ditties.



We changed all our money to the strange new currency and were confused the whole time about the exchange rate. With prices in the thousands and more thousands, we spent it too fast and were left a little irate.

Santiago is just like every other big city, crowded, dirty, and hot. A special thing we found was that unlike a hound, absolutely no one there knows their own city worth snot.

One day we rented a 12 passenger van, it was a rather big stick shift car. We all piled in end to end, plus a couple of wine drinking brits that were friends of our friends, and drove to the beaches of Viña del Mar.

The trip continued, a visit with Sarah and Christina at their hostel with a pool. We all splashed and laughed, some of us seemed quite daft, but it was nice to chill at a place that was cool.

The following day was hot and bright and we climbed all over a mountain looking around the zoo. We saw monkeys with strange behinds and giraffes that looked quite kind, and ran away from the foul smelling flamingo poo.



We left Santiago, and went to Mendoza where waited for a long time in the station. I accidentally wrote Lauren’s number, on a napkin so I could remember, but I forgot it and the waiter later picked it up with elation. :)

We got back to La Villa after a long wait in Rosario and too late to do laundry were we. We ate a quick meal, took a nap for more zeal, and then to Buenos Aires we were home free.

After a freezing ride on the bus, and much waiting at the airport for the family to appear, we reunited with much joy. They looked a little rough, and had a lot of stuff, but was I excited to see them, boy oh boy!

Christmas was interesting, not at all like in the states, there was no festive attitude to be had. But we ate haystacks and opened presents that had been in my pack, and since the family was there, it wasn’t all bad.



Lots of touring has happened, like the Recoleta Cemetery and La Boca, and many other places as well. We have done lots of talking, and even more walking, and our time here has been rather swell.



Our time is quickly waning here, but we still have some pretty grand plans. Like some tango place and church, and some tunnels that make your heart lurch, and then Lauren and I must part with our clans.

In the middle of the night, the moon is about to rise. Always having been a sucker for a pretty moon, i step outside and simply watch. My skin tingles with the anticipation. Pressing my arms tight against my body, i try to ward off the cold. Only my desire to see a full moon keeps me outside in the cold. I look at the huge glowing smile, marveling at the expression. Simply stunning. Oranges meld with creamy yellows, intensified by the inky black surrounding them. Nothing can take this moment from me, nothing but my cognitive process. Thoughts swirl around and around, fighting for precedence in my burdened mind. Only the beating of my heart drowns out the voices arguing in my head. Each has a distinct sound, a distinct train of thought. View points clash in my mind. Elevated above all else is the fleeting wish to be enveloped by that inky blackness. Relishing the thought, i throw open my arms to the night. Yelling for it to take me into its dark folds, i now welcome the chill causing the bumps on my skin. Relentlessly i scream, over and over. Every breath i draw increases my fervor. "Libéreme de esta carga!" All else escapes my attention. Thoughts start to flee. I concentrate only on my screaming. Over and around me, a fog begins to drift. "No, no, i mutter." Stumbling, i fall to the ground, unable to rise. "How did I get here?" I stare up at the moon, contemplating it once again. Perhaps it is not as stunning as i once thought. It looks funny now, almost faded. Everything starts to go hazy. Not caring anymore, i start to let the darkness envelope me. Tears escape my eyes as my once beautiful moon slips into obscurity. Even the cold doesn't bother me now. Relinquishing my pent up breath, i lay my head down, my blindness taking over once again.

blindsided

i sit in my office chair, a bit stunned after his brief visit. and even though i feel like i shouldn't, i still want to let some tears escape to run down my face.

"Kreesta. Oscar Ramos me dijo en la semana pasada, que durante el verano, tu estás solo de ACA, todo el día." or in other words, i am only working in the ACA building during the summer here, not teaching any english.

i nod my head dumbly and mumble an "ok."

thoughts swirl around in my head as i sit in silent confusion. did i do something wrong? do they not like my teaching style and just want to escape from it? am i doing a bad job? do they wish they had never brought me here? am i grateful for the break? what the heck am i going to do all day in the ACA office? great, now i get to feel even more useless.

why can't i just do what they brought me here to do?

i knew this was experimental, but to be honest, i expected more out of it. i thought i would be a better teacher than i am. i thought i would have more consistency with my students. i dared to think i could actually teach them to speak english better. by the end of this, i will have had four months with the consistent ones, two with the non-consistent ones, and with a couple of them, exactly four hours.

the thought of FAILURE is riding me hard right now. it's riding me into the ground.

i guess the only thing i can cling to now, is that by working in the office, running errands for the teachers and grading papers, i am maybe making their life just a tiny bit less hectic. a bit easier. maybe.

that kind of love

i happened upon him in my silent walk through a concrete and marble maze. i saw him from a distance, his posture speaking volumes. he was sitting next to his wife. he was quiet, contemplative. his face wore many years of hard work and experience. there was sadness in his eyes, but he was there, nonetheless.

it was plain to see that he adored his wife in the way that he stared at her face. in a sweet gesture, he had brought her flowers. no words had to be uttered. companionship said it all.

i stood back and watched for a while, marveling at the love that the little old man had for his wife. i knew that i wanted a love like that someday.

as i walked on, i had tears in my eyes. because when i left, i left him quietly resting on his marble perch, sadly staring at the picture of his wife on her cold, marble tomb.

help me to say

i have been thinking about contentment. this is something that i really struggle with, appreciating what i have, where i am, what i am doing in the here and now. most times i focus on what i am lacking. but it seems to me that contentment can be a major key to happiness. it is in contentment that we take the time to thank God for what is actually in our lives. we appreciate the moment that we are walking, breathing, feeling. it is in times of doubt and pain and hurt that we can be content because we know that things will be alright.

contentment is a choice.

my dad has been talking to me a lot about praising God in whatever circumstances. i think this is contentment as well. i know that sometimes things seem so bad that i can't even dredge up words to praise. but that's when i think of a switchfoot song i like that becomes my prayer to God. "i'm on the run. i'm on the ropes this time. where is my song? i've lost the song of my soul tonight. sing it out. take what is left of me. make it a melody."

praise is an action.

i know that sometimes i am too tired to take action. i am too soul weary to keep plodding along. i am too broken to find words. but if there is not a song in my voice, at least there can be a song deep in my soul that i will sing for all i am worth.

"Who can hold the stars and my weary heart?
Who can see everything?
I’ve fallen so hard, sometimes I feel so far
But not beyond Your reach
I could climb a mountain, swim the ocean, or do anything
But it’s when You hold me that I start unfolding
And all that I can say is

Hallelujah, hallelujah
Whatever’s in front of me
Help me to sing hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Whatever’s in front of me
I’ll choose to sing hallelujah

The same sun that rises over castles and welcomes the day
Spills over buildings into the streets where orphans play
And only You can see the good in broken things
You took my heart of stone, and You made it home
And set this prisoner free

Hallelujah, hallelujah
Whatever’s in front of me
Help me to sing hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Whatever’s in front of me
I’ll choose to sing hallelujah"

right now i am not in a euphoric state, but i'm not in the depths of despair either. i'm just . . . here. but here, now, i'm wanting to be content. i'm going to choose to be content. and in my contentment, i will praise. because God deserves it.

to be

to be nobody but yourself in a world that's doing its best to make you somebody else, is to fight the hardest battle you are ever going to fight. never stop fighting.
-- e. e. cummings

mishmash

the other day i went with lauren to the hospital because she had gotten kicked in the leg really hard during soccer practice and needed to make sure it wasn't fractured. we got a friend named shaine to go with us because he actually speaks spanish. shaine and lauren were in the exam room and i was chillin' out in the hall when all of the sudden a guy comes rushing around the corner going "we have an emergency! there's an emergency down the hall!" nurses and doctors started busting out of doors and sprinting down the hallway a little ways. there was lots of commotion that i could hear, including noises of the guy starting to aspirate or something. then there was even more commotion and people rushed by dragging the man on the ground by his hands and feet into the back where they could give him better care. it was scary. i'm pretty sure i turned pale and was prepared to bolt into the room that lauren was in should there be blood or guts or barf somewhere. i never found out what was wrong. i was really trying quite hard to eavesdrop on the spanish conversation going on, but alas, my spanish isn't quite that good yet. but i don't know what it is about this trip so far that has me be in the midst of medical emergencies. it just confirms to me though that i am indeed correct in not being in the medical field. a nurse that passes out would be of no help to anyone! i shall pursue being a doctor through the means of books and really long papers instead.

but on that note, i have been thinking about how God really has a sense of humor. i never wanted to be a teacher for my sm year, and look at what i am doing. i never wanted to go to south america. look where i ended up. i distinctly remember having a few conversations with chrees about how we should not say what we didn't want to do out loud because that is where we would end up. looks like chris followed that better than i did. he didn't end up in asia...

i had a really good feeling though the other day. i was sitting in one of the few classes i have actually taught. and i realized that i really liked it. maybe not the preparation and some of the frustrating stuff, but i felt so inspired. i wanted to teach my students to the best of my ability. it really got my brain firing to think about learning styles and creative ideas. and i thought, if i feel like this about teaching a subject that i'm not as passionate about, how would it be to teach what i AM passionate about? that got me really excited. for once, i feel like i am on the right path. i feel like i have direction in my life, a passion. and it feels good. i never thought i would discover my passion, and it has been a really fun process.

there are pigeons here. they are annoying. they poop everywhere. they fly up right in front of your face. they dive bomb you. i'm dreading the day when i get hit. they also sit in the trees and randomly spazz out. so annoying and frightening at the same time.

another theme on this trip seems to be me being violated. the other day this one teacher came in. she seemed to be very senile. she didn't understand that i didn't understand her spanish. she didn't understand that i didn't really know how to make the printer do what she wanted it to do. she didn't understand that what was coming out of the printer was not her stuff. but when haroldo came to show us what to do, i was standing in the back and looking over their shoulders. first of all, she was standing there with her elbow out and she swung around and nailed me in the chest. then because she realized i wanted to see better, she reached a hand back to grab me. but since i'm taller, her hand grabbed my butt. SHE GRABBED MY BUTT and pulled me forward. when will this stop?!

everyone kisses you on the right cheek here. so far i have only almost made a big mistake once. but i'm convinced the blemishes on my right cheek are never going to go away, because not only do i have my own face oil to combat, but also the face oil of the people who greet me. *sigh*

they have these amazing cookie things here called frutigran galletas. so good.

they have this disgusting food here called everything in the caf. so gross.

i get to go to peru!

the end

the good times just keep coming...

there are some times where i really feel like an incompetent fool.

take today for example. it's friday today, so naturally i wanted to clean. but cleaning here is so completely different than in the states. they use very different methods and products. i cannot tell you how much i miss clorox wipes! those are my very best friends. yesterday i was in the ceape (the same as our VM) and i decided to arm myself with a toilet brush and toilet cleaner, because in my brief perusal of the cleaning supplies in my bathroom, there didn't appear to be either. i have a ton of plastic water bottles filled with chemicals of some sort thanks to my roommate, but i'm not about to touch those since they are unlabeled. i don't want my toilet to explode with foam or something if i put the wrong thing in there.... but i digress.

i didn't quite know how to start cleaning, so i cleaned off my desk and then decided to give the whole room a good sweeping, walls and lights included (to get rid of the cobwebs). but then i only had one bucket that i could fill up with water and some sort of cleaning solution and i didn't know if i should clean the bathroom first, or the floor in the room first. i opted to clean the toilet first. i donned the big yellow rubber gloves that i found in the bathroom and went to work. i used my new toilet bowl cleaner and brush and felt pretty proud of myself. this is the first toilet i have seriously been afraid of though. but i then found a sponge on my roommates shelf (hopefully she doesn't use it for dishes....) and scrubbed the rest of the toilet with it.

but then i noticed the bidet.

they have those here in argentina. now i have never ever used one of those. and i don't think i ever will. but i figured that since i was cleaning the toilet, i might as well scrub that out too. so i unceremoniously squirted my toilet bowl cleaner in it and gave it a timid scrub with the brush. but then i realized that i needed to rinse it out. i studied the thing for a little bit. i knew what knobs i needed to turn to get water, but i had to figure out where the water actually came out of. i spotted where eventually. now even though i haven't ever used one of these things, i get the basic concept. i reached over and cautiously turned the knob just a smidgen. a minute trickle of water came out. well that won't get the job done. so i cautiously turned the knob a little more.....WHOOSH! a fountain of water burst forth, shooting high above my head almost to the ceiling. i stood there, shocked, with toilet water raining down on me. eventually i started giggling. and pretty soon the giggling turned to outright laughter. i stood there for a little while laughing, while water was spraying everywhere in my bathroom. on me, on the wall, on the floor. i eventually came to my senses and somehow managed to turn the water off. i couldn't believe my rookie mistake. apparently i don't have as good of a "basic concept" as i thought, so as to avoid something like that. oy.

i clean the rest of the bathroom and then the floors, but i'm still not sure if i used the right kind of cleaner or not. my room smelled kind of funny after that. and when i pulled the gloves off, my hands were covered in white powder. great.

i am not totally satisfied with my cleaning experience today, and i really miss american cleaning products. and i doubt i will ever touch a bidet again. but i do have a good story now. :)

guts, butts, and the adventures in between

last night i drank vomit. at least that's what lemon tereré tastes like to me. it was disgusting, but i made myself drink a little bit more thinking that maybe by some chance it would improve. it didn’t. i quickly searched for something else to cover up that horrid taste. we were at dale and amanda’s last night for some cold mate (that weird “t” word) and to watch some hockey. now I have never been too fond of this whole mate thing. call me weird but I just really don’t like it. but last night i tried it just because it is part of the whole experience of argentina, something that you just have to do. no excuses. so i did it, essentially kissing 9 other people in the process because you all SHARE the same STRAW! How gross is that?!

but at least now I have people to share experiences, and even straws with. a lot has happened in the last week and a half. prepare yourself, this is a long blog….

the week that anthony left was a little rough. i found myself quite alone, still the outsider of the group of people here. there were many tears that week as i fought to adjust to my new surroundings.

i eventually found out more solid facts about my time here. i found out that i was going to teach my students (seven grown men of the administrative board) one on one, rather than as a class. this was a little bit of a relief for me. i had felt really intimidated by the thought of standing in front of a class. i also found out that i would be working in the ACA office in the morning, as well as taking some classes. i was really happy to hear this, because I had thought that i really would never learn spanish and have a hard time making friends, but working in the office and taking classes was going to help both of those things. plus, i found out that i get to travel with ACA too! i am really stoked about that. i was afraid that i was just going to be stuck here in this little town for the entire time.

i had to prepare a syllabus for my class. that was stressful. i didn’t know what i was doing at all, but i came up with something and the ACA director was really impressed! i was pretty proud of myself.

this past weekend, a bunch of my friends that i had been hanging out with were all going to rosario. i opted not to go. but that meant that I had to somehow survive on my own. i contacted anthony’s friend marta. We ended up going to English Sabbath school together and then church, which was a real blessing. I then went over to her house for lunch, where I met a bunch of other people. Marta and her twin sister Mariel are so nice and fun, and their friends are really fun too, even if they are 4-6 years older than me. But I have discovered that I feel comfortable in the role of “youngster” since that is how it kind of was back at southern.

i spent the afternoon with them and eventually went back to my dorm room to sleep.

But when I woke up, it was to the horror of my life. I was brushing my teeth, walking around the room when I saw it. The most ginormous spider I have seen since being in Nicaragua. And I was alone. It was on the baseboard of the huge wardrobe things that are in my room. I stared at it for a long time. I even sat down on the ground, a safe distance away of course, and contemplated what to do. It was during this time that I decided that spiders were most definitely of the devil. I went to go get my dean, but she was nowhere to be found. I went back to my room to discover that the spider (araña in Spanish, I learned that one quick) would go back into a little hole. Great. I was really distressed. I was not going to be able to sleep that night. My bed is right on the other side of the wardrobe, so I moved my little bed as far as I could into the middle of the room. When the spider came back out, I stood there contemplating taking the squeegee in my room and going all Jackie Chan on the spider, but then something scraped across the floor in the room above me and the spider dashed back into it’s hole. Marta came into my room at that point, but she couldn’t get the spider out to kill it either. So we left.

We went to mariel’s house to have a game night. A whole bunch of couples came over, some from earlier in the day, and some singles. We had banana smoothies and popcorn and fruit and I actually ate a legit artichoke for the first time. You have to pluck the leaves off, dip them in lemon juice, olive oil, and salt and then kind of scrape them against your teeth. I had watched them do this during lunch and decided to attempt it that night. I definitely had to get a lesson. It was a little bit comical. They wanted to play a card game that they thought was so fun. And you know me and card games. No me gusta. I always opted out at so ville. But they explained it to me and convinced me to play. And lo and behold if it wasn’t the exact same game that my friends always played in so ville. What luck. But I had to go after one round.

I went back to my room, thinking that it was going to be a long night of not sleeping. I cautiously opened the door and flipped on the lights. The spider was actually chillin’ out on the floor next to the wardrobe. “it’s now or never Krista,” I told myself. I looked to the corner of my room that contained the broom and the squeegee. I decided that the broom had more surface area with which to attack the spider. So I grabbed it, went over and not giving myself time to talk myself out of it, let loose on the spider. Legs were flying everywhere as I unleashed my wrath. First it looked like I was winning, but then it would pop back up looking completely in tact. What the freak?! So I would whack it even harder. The broom was so loud as I bashed this thing relentlessly. I thought someone would come investigate. But I just kept beating it, then sweeping it to where I could take a better whack at it. I finally got it to the point where it was curling up to die. I delivered the final blow with my tennis shoe. But then I had the dilemma of what to do with the thing. I normally flush spiders down the toilet at home, but my toilet here doesn’t flush very well. There was no way I was putting it into the toilet to somehow have it resurrect and crawl on me the next time I used the bathroom. Nu-uh. But I didn’t want to put it in the trash can by my desk…..so I swept up all of the remains and various legs scattered about the room and went out into the hall, out into the lobby, where I deposited it in a trash can very far away. I went back to my room, heart pounding, and returned the broom to its place.

The next day I met dale and amanda pickett, and another married couple and two other friends at the bus station to go to a town called Victoria which is about an hour to an hour and a half away. They have hot springs there. We ended up getting there way to early. So we decided to walk down to the paraná river that was near by, because dale and matias LOVE fishing. So we walk down this country gravel road. On the way we passed a dead rotting cow in the ditch. It was disgusting. And we had to walk down wind of it. We eventually got to the end of the road but then had nowhere to go. So we took this other little road to a pasture. We hopped over a barbwire fence and into a muddy pasture with many cows that we trudged through to get to this yucky river. The girls got really bored while the boys fished, so we decided to head back. We were a little bit nervous walking among all these cows and bulls. We got back to the spa/hot springs, but it was still too early so we waited. When we got in, it was gorgeous. A beautiful panoramic view of the river, rolling green hills and the blue skies. The afternoon was spent in the hot springs.

But let me tell you. I have never seen so many butts in my life. I forgot that I am in the land of thong bikinis. And every woman, no matter what size, shape, or how much cellulite she has, dons a thong bikini. It was so gross. There were so many women that should not have even been in swimsuits, much less thong bikinis. I was pretty grossed out, but at the same time, impressed with the amount of confidence these people possess to be out in public like that! The men were almost as bad. There were so many guys with huge guts and man boobs hanging out. And don’t forget that most of the men here are extremely hairy. I’m talking you could brush their back hair with a comb hairy. Blech! The ACA director told us that Argentine's are generally more closed people, and that the Brazilians are the more open. Heaven help us when we go to the beaches in Rio de Janeiro....

We eventually left Victoria and went back to san martin to eat supper. I decided to try the meat here because it is pretty much world renown and organic. I ordered a hamburguesa completo. I hadn’t paid too much attention to what all came with it, so I was in for a surprise when my meal came. There was a hamburger all right, but with mayo, lettuce, tomato, the patty, a fried egg, a slab of pastrami, and a slice of cheese. And I ate it all, plus fries. I think I consumed more cholesterol in that one burger than is humanly possible. And then I went and had dulce de leche granizado ice cream for dessert! So good!

I started teaching the next day. It didn’t go so well. I was scheduled to have classes with the president. I get there and discover that he is gone for the week, but his secretary was going to take the class from me. Ok. So I taught her. It was a little rough. I have some refining to do. I am supposed to teach two, two hour classes to each of my students a week. That is hard! After this I was supposed to teach another student, but he didn’t want to have a lesson, just to talk a little bit. And he informed me that he was going to be gone for the rest of the week and next week as well. Two of my other students are gone until late November. Two other students don’t speak any English. My student for today cancelled….. this whole thing is going to be very interesting.

I had my first grammar classes that I attended today. The teacher doesn’t speak any English. He was confused as to who I was. I took a quiz I hadn’t studied for because it was my first class. But it is mostly review still. I mean, we are only in the present tense!

But I am much improved from my last post. I’m coming into my own, which makes me very, very happy.

I had a feeling the other day. I know that when I leave, I am going to have a fierce pride in this country. I think the love is starting to kick in….

i am a disillusionist. is that a word? well i'm making it one right now. i thought argentina was going to be like israel, namely that i was going to love it from the instant i got here. well, quite frankly, i'm still waiting for that love to kick in. it's really pretty here, amazingly beautiful farmland, and the food here is decent. but i just am having a hard time wrapping my mind around me staying here for 7 months.

i thought that i would instantly make friends. i'm terrified of everyone! i am so scared to try and speak spanish and heaven forbid someone speak in spanish to me. i have discovered that my ears indeed do not connect to my brain as i previously thought.

it is going to be very interesting. i feel so lost and so extremely frustrated with myself. i have wanted to cry pretty much all day today. i'm sort of appreciative of the weather sharing my feelings. at least something can weep when i can't. but at the same time it has been freezing and that is not what i expected either! i have been wearing my clothes (didn't we all assume that anyways? no guys, we walk around naked down here. :/ ), my coat, and rain coat, and then i added anthony's coat and precip on to that and i'm STILL cold!

today i went to the cafeteria for the first time. i told anthony that if there is anywhere in the world where i feel like a loser, it's in a cafeteria with all those unfamiliar faces and the din of spanish around me. and then he told me that that if i sit alone i will basically be swarmed by argentine guys wanting to talk to me. thanks anthony, real helpful. AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
the only boy i have actually been comfortable talking with is alex clouzet. he is nice. he probably feels sorry for me, the little scared american girl. he slacklines though. maybe i will get to practice my slacklining more. if it would stop raining.

i have a bad attitude that i need to change. last night i cried before i went to bed and as i was in bed. in the midst of crying, i sort of talked to God. i told him that i feel very un-brave right now and very wimpy. this morning, as i was searching for a new book to start for my devotions, one verse, the only one in red on the page jumped out at me: But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9.

well all i can say is that God is going to be proven as pretty darn powerful because this scared little american girl is very weak.

God, can you just PLEASE reconnect my ears?!

p.s. there is a very large spider that lives by my bed that i discovered last night. i think of him as bob, but that seems a little unoriginal for me. he is living only because i am scared of him. which doesn't really make sense, other than that there is NO WAY i am sticking my hand down in that corner to kill him. he would bite my hand off. no thanks. i'm going to need that hand.

but yeah, this isn't what i thought it was going to be. but hopefully this disillusionist will become a non disillusionist. i don't want to say an illusionist because that wouldn't really make sense, now would it? i really need to get on this proper english thing since i'm going to be teaching it.. oh boy.

one long continuous day separated by three naps (title by anthony handal)

i believe i can say that i have had a pretty exciting and eventful last few days full of new experiences and things that hopefully never happen again!

it all started on monday. my plane left minneapolis/st. paul airport on time. but little did i know that when i was talking to nick before our call was lost, that the storm he mentioned would be the exact storm that kept me in the airplane circling atlanta for an extra hour and a half. i was freaking out on the plane thinking that i was going to miss my flight to argentina and cause all sorts of problems for meeting up with anthony. but the plane eventually landed and then i was left to wait to get off the plane.

while i was waiting, nick called me. he said that he was in the airport and wanted to see me if possible. but alas, i had to rush to my next flight. i told nick i couldn't make it to see him, but i was really touched that he had driven all that way. i made it to my next flight on time, but others didn't, so we waited for them. for an extra hour and a half. i could've seen nick after all. but it was too late.

being on that airplane was the first time i felt overwhelmed by all the spanish i heard around me.

when we finally took off, we were in the air for about twenty minutes before i noticed a commotion about five rows ahead of me. a guy was having a seizure. people crowded around, and doctors on the flight took care of him. i felt a little reassured that should i have a medical emergency, i would be taken care of.

the flight was really long and boring, and would end up being longer than i thought.

about four or five hours later, the man had another seizure, and it was a big one, with vomiting i believe (sorry nick). i was glad that i was not in the near vicinity. but everyone was talking and we had to make an emergency landing in panama city, panama. so i was technically in panama, but i technically wasn't in panama. that sucks. we sat on the ground for 1-2 hours, but eventually ended up leaving the guy there....i feel kind of bad.

you know the map they show that tracks the plane's progress? well yeah, according to that, i never left atlanta the entire flight. so much for being informed.

p.s. i watched karate kid in the airplane. good movie. you should see it.

after six hours in the air to panama, it was another six hours to argentina. my plane got there late. anthony and i had planned to meet in the gate area. i was quickly ushered to customs. i never found anthony. i kept hoping he would be in the next section but he wasn't. i was really freaked out, i had to go through customs alone.

i paid my fee, turned in some papers and went to baggage claim. no anthony. i got my bags but at this point i teared up. i was scared and trying to come up with a plan to page him in the airport if i couldn't find him. but thankfully he was out waiting for me in the main part of the airport.

we left and got a taxi. this is where it gets interesting again. when we were driving to exit the airport, all of the sudden police stopped us. police cars parked behind us. we had to get out of the car. passports were shuffled about, lots of talking while krista sat there in blissful ignorance as to what was happening in the spanish storm around her. it ended up being that we had gotten into a taxi with crooks. the police stepping in was actually a good thing. we got into another taxi and went to the adventist church in buenos aires. did i mention it was raining this whole time while we were standing outside? oh, and i hadn't peed for at least 9 hours and wouldn't for another 2.

it took a long time to get into the church, but the people were really nice to us. they let us leave our bags as we walked around the city. it is a cool city, very beautiful. but something awful happened on the way back to the church. we left down town as everyone was getting off of work. the subway was a mess. i had no idea that many people could squish into a tiny car. i was mushed up into anthony and people were pressing into me on every side. krista turner no longer had any space bubble. maybe it was even going into the negative realm. where space bubble had been 10 feet before, in the subway, it turned into -26 billion. but little did i know that it was about to become -260 kajillion. there was this creepy man that had gotten on a few stops after us. he gradually made his way over to where i was and seemed really strange about getting really close to me. i'm sorry for the graphic nature, but honestly, his hand ended up basically in my crotch. i freaked out. i turned away, he maneuvered too. i spun around the other direction, he did too. i was getting into sheer panic mode. i backed as far as i could into anthony and straight up watched this guy's hand to make sure he wouldn't do that again. anthony was about to push me behind him when the guy got off. i don't know if this guy was doing that on purpose, or if it was just so crowded that he couldn't avoid it, but nonetheless, i felt really shaken after that. ugh.

when we got back to the church, i experienced something that again invades my space bubble. the right cheek kiss. everyone does it in argentina. i'm still getting used to it.

well anthony and i eventually ended up at the bus station to catch a bus to the town where UAP is. it left at 11:00. we arrived in the rain at 4:45 in the morning. we went to the gate of the university to see if they would let us in. they wouldn't. we had to go back to the station and sit on the most uncomfortable benches. we eventually find our way into the university a few hours later only to find that the deans weren't on duty. more waiting. eventually they show up, but they didn't really have a room for me, which they said that they would. more waiting. anthony and i toured the town while we waited, in the rain.

i come back and they show me to my room. i live off campus about a block in a third dorm thing. i have one roommate. she speaks very little english. everyone here speaks very little english. it has been interesting. we live in a decent sized room with our own bathroom! praise the Lord! by this point i hadn't peed in like 14 or 15 hours. neither had anthony. we were tired and dehydrated but kept going on with getting things arranged. anthony found a bridge to camp under tonight while i showered, which i hadn't done for like three days. i reeked, i felt disgusting, and i had been rained on countless times. it wasn't pretty. but i did get a warm shower, which felt soo good!

i met up with anthony again and we hiked to the bridge. apparently we were like the pied piper for the stray dogs, particularly one who seemed to be the poster boy for dogs with STDs. he has issues. serious issues. we went to the bridge where anthony proudly displayed his little set up. we sat down and ended up falling asleep. so i can now say that i have indeed slept under a bridge! i feel like chelsea would be really proud of me on this one.

we have been bumming around town doing not a whole lot because today was a holiday and no one was at the school for me to talk to. anthony has fallen asleep countless times and is in fact asleep at the table next to me in this internet cafe.

but have no fear, i think i will like it. it will be challenging for sure, and it already has been. but i have gotten a taste of what it is like to communicate in spanish! and it is exciting.

i miss everyone a lot. thanks for your well wishes and prayers. anthony and i didn't eat until four today, so we are going to get a real supper now.

this has been THE LONGEST DAY EVER, and it's not quite over yet.... we shall see if we have any adventures left for us tonight!

stupid brain

i am having one of those nights when i can't turn my brain off in order to sleep. it is very frustrating. it usually happens the night before something exciting is going to happen, like a big trip or seeing a boy that i like the next day in school. but i don't know why exactly my brain is refusing to go into hibernate mode. if only there were a button for that like there is on my computer. if only someone could just come up to me and push my belly button and i would slowly go blank with only a pulsing light to let people know i was indeed alive, just hibernating. i don't know why i can't sleep. maybe it was the fact that i sat on my butt all day watching football. or maybe it was the fact that i took a decently long nap late this afternoon. or maybe it was the fact that i had a chai tea latte after supper (don't those have caffeine in them?!) whatever it is, i am not tired and lying in bed is not helping the situation. i've heard that if you can't sleep, you should go to some other place than your room and do something relaxing to help ease your mind into "it's time to sleep" mode. well i can't really go anywhere else right now. i suppose i could go over and sit in the chair in my room, but it's cold and i quite frankly don't want to get out of my warm bed. but i am hoping that writing will get all of these things out of my mind, or at least make me feel like i have talked about them and can leave them be for the moment.

there are three things that i am thinking of mainly. a) a boy, b) a song, and c) argentina. i feel really silly saying this, like i am some preteen girl, but this boy is really on my brain. a lot. i really like him. :) enough said. the song i keep thinking about is one that chelsea told me about. it is so beautiful. it is one of those melodies that just touches my heart and soul. the emotion that runs through me when i hear it is insane. a real crying out to God. since i have been listening to it, a.k.a. only a billion times already, i have become determined to learn it. i really want to push myself to play the piano better and to sharpen my skills of hearing things, learning chords, and being able to sing while i play. then i can truly cry this song out to my God, whether it be in the privacy of my own small room on my humble old upright, or in front of others if i ever work up the nerve to share my talents. the third thing, argentina, is occupying a large chunk of my brain and will require its own paragraph.

at this point in the night, it is one week until i leave for argentina. i am excited beyond belief, but also scared, which i will admit is understandable. at least it is understandable in my brain. i am scared because there are a lot of unknowns, but that is also exciting in its own way. it will be so good, but up until now, i think i have been thinking mainly of the good, and not so much how hard it will actually be. i know that the instant i get down there i will be overwhelmed. i am going to have to work my butt off in order to learn the language. there will be much forcing of myself out of my comfort zone going on so that i can learn this language for reals. if anyone could hear me right now they would laugh because i am lying here in bed thinking up all these different scenarios and talking to myself (and other imaginary people) in my limited spanish. "hola!" "mucho gusto!" "como estas?" "lo siento pero mi espanol es muy malo, especialmente despues del verano." "habla ingles?" "hable muy lentamente por favor!" it is really depressing trying to carry on a conversation with myself and realizing i know about two of all the words i need for a sentence. there is going to be a lot of "no entiendo-ing" and "como se dice-ing" going on. :( i want to embrace this experience whole-heartedly. i know i will regret it if i don't. but that means a lot of stretching myself. but hey, i wanted growth didn't i? it will be really interesting to see the person i am after this year. i wonder if i will be the pretty much the same, or just a better version of me, krista 2.0. anthony told me tonight that he had talked to one of his friends down there and she is excited to meet me and take care of me. that really warms my heart. someone wants to take care of me! i cannot express how badly i want to form some really deep bonds with people down there, not just students, but people in the church and community. i feel like i could learn a lot from them in many ways. i feel like i could learn a lot about myself too. i sort of wonder if i have too high of hopes, but doesn't that mean that i will just try harder to fulfill those dreams? in my past, i have tended to be a pessimist, so why all of the sudden am i so optimistic about this? i will admit, i like being optimistic about it. it is going to be one of the greatest experiences of my life. i have no doubt about that. i like to think about all the possibilities of this coming year. but i don't like to think about them this late at night when i am trying to go to sleep.

chrees would be proud. i brought it back around, just like a good speech or article or something. mr. nesius would be proud too, right jess?

well i'm going to listen to this wonderful song one more time and then call it a night. hopefully.

late at night

it's late at night and i am nostalgic. i am often nostalgic when it gets to be my favorite time of the day. the night time is the right time. that phrase makes me think of anthony. i'm sitting here on my comfy bed. it is dark. i have five candles scattered about my room that are emitting a wonderfully delicate glow. the candles make me think of friday nights in southern village. dissonance, then delicious resolution fills my ears. a haunting song that fits the mood i am in. the song makes me think of chrees.

i looked through all my pictures tonight. it is amazing the time and distance that you can travel in your mind. i went back to israel. israel makes me think of martin and ross and alex and brianna and ben and countless others. i went back to graduation where all of us were hanging on to the precious few moments we had left with each other. those dear ones that i love so much and will always want back. i went back to sabbath afternoon meals at elisa and graves'. i went back to our awesome back porch, volleyball afternoons, and walks. i went back to when i painted in church with nick. i went back to my art show. i went back to our road trip over christmas. i went back to our photo shoots, our thanksgiving meals, our crafty times. i went back to last fall when tara, chels, schnell and i decided to try and hurdle a couch outside on our lawn. i went back to that one awful weekend. i went back to nicaragua and my time there. that makes me miss kaitlin. i went back to high school and banquet and valley fair. i went to all my major memories and all the really good little ones in between, the ones that make friendships.

my journey made me smile. it made me want to cry. it made me laugh out right. so many memories, so many friends, family really, that has ties deeper and stronger than blood. there are so many memories that i wish i could re-live and go back to. precious times.

sometimes i have feelings so strong and deep in my soul that i almost can't stand it. a need to go back, a need to capture more memories, a need to see what the future holds.

i wonder why memories and yearnings have to evoke such deep emotion in me. why can't i accept them for the good times i had and move on? why do they have to hurt so much sometimes, even if it is a good hurt?

i don't know. but i guess that is the good thing about memories. i have all the mental images and feelings and atmosphere that were tied to that specific point in time all in my mind, ready for instant recall if i should so choose. this past year i really stocked up on the memories. i know for a fact that those memories will spur me on to create more WITH THOSE SAME PEOPLE. they will get me through this next year.

my memories are my record of my life. i have had a dang. good. life.

reflection

when i look back at who i was a year ago, the change is insane. i have done like a 180, or at least a 90.... but whatever the degree, i have grown so much. and i have to admit, i'm really proud of that. i'm proud of the fact that i used to be a shy, timid girl who thought that she didn't matter, but now am a girl that has confidence and is gaining more each and every day. i'm proud of the fact that i somehow found strength that i didn't even know i had, to do what i knew was right for me. i'm proud of the fact that i used to be a scaredy-cat who was afraid to try anything new and out of her comfort zone, and now i am a person who is opening up my mind more and more and is willing to try new things and, dare i say it, becoming a person who seeks out adventure. i'm proud of the fact that i used to be a really up-tight person, but have chilled out a lot and am still working on that area. i'm proud of the fact that i was settling in my relationship with God but now want to change that. i'm proud of the fact that i used to see myself as ugly and unappealing, but now i am beginning to discover my beauty, inside and out.

i am proud of the fact that i used to be stagnant in so many areas of my life, but now am searching and growing so much spiritually and emotionally, and just as a whole. i think i have seen more growth in the last year of my life than in the last 20. and it feels good. really good. and now that i have tasted a bit of that growth, i want more.

and i'm going to get it.

i'm going to argentina soon. i feel that this year is going to stretch me beyond belief. it scares me to death, but i know it will be good for me, and in the end, i will absolutely have grown from the process. i'm excited to see what God has in store.

before i went to israel this summer, i was really depressed. my heart was torn up into a million little pieces, and was with my friends at wawona. i felt like i had made a wrong decision in going to israel. i was grumpy about it, straight up. but then i went to israel and it was seriously one of the best decisions i have ever made. i learned so much on that trip and grew so much as well.

i am a little depressed right now before i go to argentina. this time, my heart is not only torn up into a million little pieces, but is scattered about the country. many of the pieces are congregating in collegedale tennessee. there are pieces in georgia. there are pieces in illinois, minnesota, north dakota, iowa, utah, colorado, california, and washington, not to mention italy, and peru. the process of getting the logistics worked out to even go to argentina has been a nightmare, leaving me to question if i should even be going. but i am just keeping my israel experience in mind. i'm hoping for a repeat performance.

my friend has a saying "i will not let my past dictate my God" and i need to heed that. i will not let my past insecurities dictate how my God is going to work in me in this coming year. i will not let my past reactions and tendencies dictate how i react to troubled times. my God is working. i will leave it in his huge capable hands. i will grow, even in this.

I'm just a little bit caught in the middle
Life is a maze and love is a riddle
I don't know where to go
I can't do it alone I've tried
And I don't know why

I am just a little girl lost in the moment
I'm so scared but I don't show it
I can't figure it out
It's bringing me down I know
I've got to let it go
And just enjoy the show

when i was a kid, the movie mulan came out. i never liked it a ton because the first time i watched it, i got sick later that night and so i always associated that movie with being sick. but there is one song in the movie that really resonates with me. it's called reflection.

Look at me
I will never pass for
A perfect bride
Or a perfect daughter
Can it be
I'm not meant to play this part?
Now I see
That if I were truly
To be myself
I would break my family's heart.

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
Why is my reflection someone
I don't know?
Somehow I cannot hide
Who I am, though I've tried.
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

although i still have a long ways to go, i think that my reflection is finally starting to show who i am inside. and that feels good. really good.

simple pleasures

i like to think that i take time to enjoy the simple pleasures in life, but in reality i rarely do slow down to smell those proverbial roses. maybe that should be a goal of mine in this coming year, something to work on and improve. but tonight, tonight i am lying here, basking in something so small, yet something i love:

the sound of rain on the roof.

i stared at the clouds a lot this evening.

the sky was a pale orange and the clouds were a deep blue that stood out in patches smattered across the sky. perfect compliments. i stared at the clouds because i stare at things when i think. i stare at things when my mind is lost in itself. i wanted a distraction, but then the thought of a distraction hurt.

do you ever have memories that are perfect? that you wish you could somehow magically go back to?

that's why i stare. i stare because in that moment, magic happens. and i am back where everything was perfect....

some things...

some things just might be falling into place.

and i like that.

facing the unknown

i am on the edge. the edge of the unknown. my whole life is an unknown at this very moment. i can cower, embrace fear, and worry.

but why do that?

unknown? or adventure?

i'm gonna rock this adventure. you better believe it.

heading home

my time here is winding down quickly. in less than a week i will be flying all the way back over to the place i came from. the anticipation and excitement of this trip will be just a sweet memory. the friends i made may or may not ever enter my life again. the joy i have had on this trip has been priceless. the experiences, more than i thought they could be.

it is a very bittersweet time. trying to cram in all my last minute jobs, pleasures, and time with friends. knowing that in three days they leave for the states and i remain for a few more days. a few more hours. a few more minutes.

israel has been amazing.

heck yes, i've been in israel!

the peace that beats all

when one digs a lot in dirt, it means one gets very dirty. when one gets very dirty, it means one spends a lot of time in the shower. when one spends a lot of time in the shower, one gets a lot of quality alone time to think (or sing with the great acoustics, but that's beside the point).

one thing that keeps filling my mind when in the shower think tank, is the concept of peace that passes understanding. i love thinking about this concept. it is so hard to actually embrace, but so wonderful in the same. i love thinking about a God that cares so much that he can give us peace of mind that can conquer even the most difficult situations to give over to him. it's peace that floods your being, even when you literally have no idea how something can work out, no solution to a problem, no end of the ache in your soul, conflict, trials, tribulations. you name something, and this peace can take it out. it seriously boggles my mind. the peace that we don't understand. it goes beyond our understanding. wow.

i'm not sure i have that kind of peace, but i am getting there. i'm learning day by day that God is amazing in ways that i never thought. i'm learning that he is so in control. more than i give him credit for.

peace.

dang. i love peace. it is so cool.

he can still move mountains

i think too much sometimes. i worry even more. there are some things that i think i can't deal with, that are too big for me to conquer. i blow things out of proportion. i take my problems and magnify them. i think that there is no way they can go away. i make mountains out of mole hills.

but my Savior. yeah. he's pretty sweet. he can still move those mole hill mountains.

thinking

there are some things in life that can stop you in your tracks. sometimes what we think we perceive is not always the truth. people can surprise you. you can surprise yourself. there is so much that we base our thoughts, opinions, beliefs and life on, when sometimes it shouldn't be that way. when the norm is challenged, how do we respond? how do we dig deeper, learn more, and convert our findings into actions? when can we be allowed the opportunity to think with our hearts and feel with our minds? misinterpretation happens all too often. ignorance often rules our beings. there are some things in life that can stop you in your tracks. but there are always things to make you start walking again.

the unfortunate camera skills of krista and harald

so harald is on this trip with me in israel. we didn't know each other very well before the trip. his trip to visit southern during his spring break helped a little bit, but this trip has fast made us friends. naturally as friends, we want to take pictures together. or rather i say 'harald, get in the picture' and shove a camera in his hand or mine.

unfortunately, neither of us are amazing at the self inflicted picture taking. i'm sure you will see why.



this was our first picture together. we had someone else take it. but as you can see, we have a good distance between us. we were still working out space bubble issues at this point.

then once we took one picture together, of course there would be more to follow. but this is where it starts going downhill. we stopped asking other people to take pictures and just took them ourselves.

first up, harald. location: jordan river.



first attempt. not bad. but he wasn't sure he actually took one. so he tried again.



second attempt. about the same, but definitely not better.



third attempt. worst one yet. harald decides to smile, but chooses to cut mine out.



fourth attempt . . . oh let's just move on.

since every day the workers go to work at 4:30 there is not time before we leave to get breakfast, plus we need a lot of energy while working. so at the dig site there are breaks for croissants, and then a watermelon break and then breakfast. we attempted to document the watermelon break.

second up, me. location: breakfast tent, dig site.



apparently my arm is not long enough. somebody rescue us!



ok, that's better.

today we arrived in jerusalem and were touring some sites. by now harald and i had not taken a picture together for a few days. guess what. we decided to try again. after all, important sites need documentation, right? and who wants pictures of just scenery.

next up, me. location: citadel museum.



eh, i'm still having issues, but it is getting better. notice we resolved our space bubble issues.

who knows what the picture future will hold. i'm excited to see.

hi from both of us from beautiful israel!


p.s. for pete's sake, someone show this blog to gabe!

continuing the theme

some stuff that i have done of late.

i have tried different excavating things.

i have hauled buckets for 7 hours.

i have fried my shoulders (ok that is not really new)

i have seen a tarantula.

i have peed in a disgusting port a potty (NEVER AGAIN)

i have successfully shaved my legs in one of the most difficult showers ever.

i have slept with no air conditioning for forever now.

i learned about surveying and taking points to make a 3D reconstruction.

i learned how to line up the actual survey prism. super cool.

i ate a food i knew had the potential to make me sick, but thought "what the heck, why not?" and downed it.

i have learned knew terms

i have learned how to read pottery and document it.

i have relearned many things about excel....

i have been learning to go with the flow to the max.

i have learned how to wash pottery.

i have been loving life and embracing it.

i miss you all. much love!

digging and chaining

guys! i cannot believe how much fun i am having! today was the first day of digging. ariel and i had found out the day before that we are actually not going to be working on the site with people. mucho sad. it's funny, because i have become such a social butterfly on this trip. i love being around people. i was even called "really social" hah! can you believe that? anywho, back to the point. since we found out we weren't going to be on the site or see the others a ton, we decided to get up at 4:00 in the morning with the rest of the crew to go out to the site just to see it. we ended up working with the crew for four hours! i filled dirt bags to mark out the squares for a long time and then i was part of bucket chains and that was SO SUPER FUN!!! i rock at bucket chaining, let me tell you. we hauled so much dirt and rocks. i was filthy, utterly filthy, and was sweating like a man. but I LOVED IT! it was so much fun. i can't even explain. the camaraderie we all have built in just five short days is so amazing. for a long time i had martin on one side of me cracking me up all morning and annalee on the other, who is equally as funny. at water and lunch breaks i would joke around with harald and ross. these people here are amazing and we have an awesome group. i was laughing, goofing off (in a safe manner of course), smiling, sweating, working so hard, and it was amazing. i wish i could go back. i wish i could be with these people all the time. i am going to miss them when we are not together. i am meeting so many new people as well and am just loving it!!! and you know something amazing? people here remember my name. they think i'm funny. they like to hang out with me. they will seek me out.

so in spite of all my excitement, there is sadness. i'm sad that i don't get to see these people all the time, and i'm sad because of some recent events that just give me a little twinge of pain. but. i guess i can't think about that, now can i?

some amazing sites i have seen in the past few days. pictures will (may?) be coming soon.

so i am staying in a hostel. it's kind of crummy. the bed is not that great. there are some bugs that get in our room, like the monster cricket tonight that martin had to come and get as well as kill a spider. our air conditioner doesn't work. we eat the same food all the time. the shower is . . . interesting. but i don't care. my motto this trip has become "suck it up and just do it. roll with it" and i am. i am rolling with it big time. and i am doing more than just rolling. i'm enjoying it while i'm rolling with it.

i wish i could share all the information that i am learning. all these things that are so enlightening to the Bible and how God was so deliberate in the things that he would do. it is amazing to hear. i can't even describe it.

i got asked if i was asian again today. someone also assumed i was an israeli. who knew my look could be so versatile?! hah!

today i touched pottery that is super old. kinda cool if you think about it.

i love it here. one of the best decisions i ever made.

it was hot and then some...

today was our official first day of touring. i will highlight the day with some pics because, they are basically the best way to convey what happened!



this is the site of hazor, which southern excavated some of a couple years ago... first site of the day.



this was a huge cistern to store water inside of the city. it is a big deal because not many places had cisterns inside the city walls. it was really deep and really cool, a great relief after being in the sun. there was no water in the bottom because the water tables are low, but it was dank enough that there was condensation on the hand rail. it smelled really funny too. it is insane to think of what those women did to get water. the original stairs are very small and steep and slant downward. it was like thigh master 5000 trying to get back up. all of us were winded.



this is golan heights. the town with the mosque in the distance is in syria. this is the closest i will get to syria until my passport expires 7 years from now. the un controls the part in the middle with all the white buildings. we passed some syrian bunkers from when syria invaded israel trying to get control of the limited water source.



the israeli army was doing a training exercise and campout on the way back from golan heights. it was crazy. there were tons and tons of tanks!



this is me with a remanent of a pillar from banias. banias is near caesarea phillipi. it had the temple of pan and other things like courts of nemesis and sacred goats and even one for dancing goats. this place made things click for me in a Bible story. this area was inundated with pagan religions, specifically worshiping pan, the god of chaos. this is the place where Jesus healed a little boy with epilepsy, which back then was thought of as a manifestation of pan. it is in this area where Jesus asked peter, who do they say i am? BAM! Jesus conquered and overthrew pan by healing the boy in an area that fully believed in pan. talk about discrediting. take that pan!



these are some pictures from tel dan. it was actually pretty lush there. they have a beautiful reserve with a river that comes from a mountain so it is super cold and it feeds the jordan. there is a big city ruin here with a huge city wall that is super cool! they also have an altar that they reconstructed and it is huge. this is the place were jereboam (i think) set up a gold calf for people to worship so they wouldn't have to go to jerusalem. the last picture is a gate made of mud bricks that they think dates back to the time of abraham!



i ate an authentic falafel! it was really good! i had a super fun table and it felt really good to sit, eat, drink cold water, get to know people and cool off.



that's lebanon. also the closest i will get to this country with my current passport.



this is the sea of galilee, where i am staying.



a bunch of us went swimming in it to cool off after our long hot day.





you see those red marks on my leg? well they are a battle scar. as i was getting out after swimming, i was trying to not stop on rocks, and succeeded for most of the way in. but i put my knee down one time and BAM!

I GOT PINCHED BY A CRAB IN THE SEA OF GALILEE!!

it was the weirdest, grossest feeling EVER! i don't recommend it. i screamed 'WHAT THE HECK IS THAT?!' and bolted and flopped and tripped my way up the rest of the way to shore. it must have been a sight to behold.

p.s.

for all you wawonians

one year ago, today, this is what my leg looked like after darebase....



talk about an initiation



but my my. look at how well time can heal wounds.